Yeah, that would never fly for me. Nobody is going to become more interested in me as experienced in only a 15 minute sitting, while conversely I can maintain interest in ANYBODY for 15 minutes. That's just a recipe for me getting in my head about people that I would realize are not right for me within another 30 minutes, who will never call me again.
1st date is more about maintaining the level of interest, not raising it. They were interested enough in you to go on a date with maybe just remote correspondence. A quick date is just an extension of that. Maintaining enough interest in a first date will lead to a second. The first two are just like job interviews. You get a ton more information seeing someone face to face than you do with remote correspondence. I can find out more about a person in 5 minutes of meeting than I can in 5 weeks of chatting on a messaging app. It's the in-person 1st impression. That impression can't be erased with another hour of time with the person.
I'm looking at limiting downside of a meeting while not necessarily raising the ceiling. The downside is more important to me. If I don't pass the first impression, then I don't want for the person to be stuck with me for an hour following. Just break it off right there, but we'll finish our coffee first.
>It's the in-person 1st impression. That impression can't be erased with another hour of time with the person.
I honestly don't think that I show any personality within the first 15 minutes of meeting someone. I am polite and interested, sure, but 15 minutes is about the minimum to organically hit on conversation that moves past that level.
Right, but my focus is more about making the date tolerable if you don't click right away. There's nothing worse than being on a long date with someone when you know within the first 5 minutes that you aren't interested. And again, you showed enough to get the person to meet you in the first place and that was likely through the exchange of remote messages. Maybe I miss out by not giving the date more time to work, but there's an abundance of options. There will always be more dates as long as you are putting in the right effort. That first date is like a quick interview which screens people for a more extensive meeting.
I'm one hundred percent with you on the long date thing. I do believe first dates shouldn't be in a locked-in setting. My first date probably look exactly like yours, except that my goal is to keep things going as long as is enjoyable.
